- Trying to figure out understand life? Looking for a little bit of happiness? Struggling to understand how to make the most out of your situation?
These universal truths may help point you in the right direction.
Of course, nothing is true all of the time, and there will always be exceptions to
the rule, but you will likely find that these truths hold up in many circumstances.
Happiness is a choice
“Happiness is a choice” is an unpopular phrase among unhappy people. And rightly so. Happiness being a choice implies that unhappy people are choosing to be unhappy. And why would anyone choose to be unhappy?
The reason is that it is easy to choose to be unhappy, languish in negative thoughts, fill your mind with negative, awful things, and continue to feed the beast instead of working to replace those negative things with positive things.
Mental illness and trauma are different, though. Sometimes, a person’s brain isn’t doing the right things, making the person unable to choose happiness. That’s not their fault and doesn’t really apply in that situation. That choice is being imposed upon them by these problems that they have. But once you start getting those things under control, you have to start choosing happiness because it will not likely just fall out of the sky into your lap.
Low expectations increase happiness
“Things are going to happen: great things, terrible things. Sometimes you’ll be able to work hard and directly affect the outcome of those things, sometimes you won’t. Sometimes you’ll do all the work you need to do, and everything will blow up in your face. Sometimes you’ll get dumped by a romantic partner out of nowhere. Many of these things will be out of your control Low expectations increase happiness because you won’t spend your time being angry, sad, or disappointed that things didn’t work out the way you hoped. You can’t be both happy and angry at the same time.
Gratitude is an antidote for pessimism
Gratitude is such a powerful tool for increasing your optimism, peace of mind, and personal happiness. A lot of people say this, but they rarely explain how it actually works. It’s about retraining your mind to stop looking for terrible and negative things. You will likely experience a fair amount of suffering, failure, and things that just don’t work out in life. Everyone does. That’s normal. But that pain can be made smaller by being grateful that you’re still alive and have the opportunity to try again. Gratitude can completely defuse the sting of these losses because you know there is always something else out there.
Kindness is rarely the wrong choice
Kindness is so powerful. Not only is it powerful to the people around you, but it can help silence anger, turmoil, and sadness. Unfortunately, many people mistakenly think that kindness is solely about its benefit to the person who is receiving it. It’s not. It’s also about not harboring negative thoughts and feelings that can disrupt your happiness and well-being. Kindness does not mean that you need to be nice all the time or a doormat. Opportunists will absolutely test your limits and may try to take advantage of you. Not all of them are bad people. Sometimes people who are having a hard time can’t tell when they are overstepping. Boundaries are important.
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure
This relatively common truth alludes to how much easier it is to prevent a problem than cure it. It often takes far less time and effort to prevent a problem from happening than devoting the time, effort, and money to fixing the problem later. For example, it’s much easier to eat a healthy diet and exercise regularly than lose weight later. People tend to focus on exercise to try to lose weight. But once you look at the kind of calories that you actually burn while exercising, you quickly realize that exercise isn’t enough. So, you also need to develop a healthier diet and break the bad habits that got you there in the first place.
That’s a whole lot of extra work.
Closure is not always possible
Closure is a luxury that not everyone gets. Sometimes terrible things happen, and your life will get turned upside down with no rhyme or reason at all. Unfortunately, that’s just how it goes sometimes. The greatest gift you can give yourself is to learn to accept the blows that come with life without wasting too much time looking for the reasons. Sometimes you’ll get them, sometimes you won’t. People throw away years of their life and happiness, wringing their hands over things that are entirely out of their control. Don’t do that to yourself.
It is what it is
There are a lot of things in life that you will just have no control over. It may be a thing that happens to you that is less than great. On the other hand, it may be something bigger, like a social perception that negatively affects you that you just can’t change. People tend to think that their anger means something. They point to people who are fueled by their anger who have fought and achieved things. The problem is, there is no reason why you can’t accept what is, identify an injustice, and choose to fight anyway. “It is what it is” implies passiveness, but that isn’t how it needs to be. You can accept what has happened but still act to influence what comes next.
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